A letter to Carson Daly

Dear Mr. Daly,

You are not funny.  You are not entertaining.  There’s a reason why your show is aired at 12:30 in the morning.

Just how many frat boys do you have writing your fart and boob jokes anyways?  Aren’t they supposed to be on strike or something?

Oh yeah, and could you go home and eat a hamburger or something?  You look absolutely disgusting.  Like a pencil neck.

Thank you for your time,

ErnieBot